Wine For the Road

The Darwin Awards are awarded to people who have died because they made an incredibly stupid mistake.   They have essentially removed themselves from the gene pool, giving evolution a big assist.  They also give honorable mentions for good (but failed) attempts.  One of those went to Labile (name changed for obvious reasons), who found an innovative way to consume vast quantities of wine at a price of zero. He invented wine for the road.  I cannot count the number of ways he could have died.  Forthwith, the tale of the crafty wine slurper.

2020 Honorable Mention: Wine For The Road


Oklahoma Wine Buying Guide

Thanks to Oklahoma City channel 9 (CBS affiliate) for this handy Oklahoma wine buying guide. We advise treating this as an example that can be easily applied to other areas.  And to think — our site is still free!

Oklahoma wine buying guide

(click for larger image)

(Thanks to @GretchenInOK for the image.)

Something Every Wine Lover Can Use

We all have bottles of wine that are not quite up to our standards, but still quaffable. Cartoonist Sandy Boynton (@SandyBoynton) has created something every wine lover can use.  Download the image, print it, trim, and apply as necessary.  (Published here with Ms. Boynton’s permission.  Thanks, Sandy!)

Sandy Boynton wint label something every wine lover can use

(click for larger image)

A Wine Glass For Troubled Times

No idea who did this.

Wine glass for troubled times

Just in Time for Christmas.

Shark Wine Glass

(click for larger image)

The gift for every wine lover you know.  Available through Amazon.com in many varieties.

Just in time for Christmas.

Political Wine

When she was still writing for Bloomberg, Megan McArdle did a winetasting of two wine clubs: National Review and The Nation.  The former is conservative, the latter is very liberal. Hence, political wine. Her article is pretty entertaining as well as being informative.  The specific piece was “Drinking to Blur Party Lines. A taste-test battle of two partisan wine clubs: National Review vs. the Nation” (November, 2015).  Forthwith, a few paragraphs.

Naturally, I had to subscribe to both. I imagined a titanic showdown between the somewhat stuffy traditionalist wines of the heirs to William F. Buckley, and the strident cosmopolitanism of the Nation’s approach. Then I placed the orders, and realized that both wine clubs are supplied by the same third-party company.

In a way, this made things even more interesting. Would the wines in both shipments be the same, denoting the collapse of American politics into a single corporatist enterprise? Or would they be different — the Nation’s box stuffed with little vintages hand-produced by impoverished Guatemalan villagers under a fair trade cooperative, the National Review box full of American wines with little flags on the labels? And which would be better?

For $70 apiece, I was sent two boxes of wine, each containing 14 bottles. Then I invited over my friend Matt Ficke, a software developer who used to be a sommelier and the manager of DC’s fanciest cocktail bar. We sat down with his wife, Becks, and my husband, Peter, to discover what we had.

It took us three bottles to get to anything that anyone would consider drinking for any reason other than scientific inquiry. This was the Willow Springs California Cabernet Sauvignon (from National Review). My companions’ reviews were more along the lines of “I would totally drink this” than “Let’s make a note of the name so we can buy it again.”

“This has many of the flavors that you associate with cabernet sauvignon,” Matt said carefully.

The next bottle, a Silver Pony Cabernet Sauvignon from the Nation, represented a substantial regression. Matt licked his lips, stuck out his tongue and looked pained. His wife dumped the glass into our spit cup, declaring that it was too sweet. Indeed, when I tasted it, it was unpleasantly reminiscent of communion wine.

Why the Dinosaurs Went Extinct

At last, after centuries of “scientific” chicanery, we can reveal the true story of why the dinosaurs went extinct.

Dinosaurs had no wine

Tennessee and Environs

The other day a kindly correspondent posted this on Twitter. It’s a sign in West Meade Wine and Liquors in Nashville, TN. This confuses and disturbs me.

Tennessee and Environs

(click for larger image — not recommended0

Bradrona in New Zealand

Bradrona? BRADRONA? Read on.

Bradrona from Google Earth

Bradrona from Google Earth (click for larger image)

Belden Barns remains one of our favorite new discoveries from a few years ago. Nate Belden and his lovely wife Lauren Hirshfield Belden are currently visiting New Zealand. It happens that Lauren and I are Facebook friends. She recently posted this:

“Welcome to Bradrona” –one of the more bodacious sites we’ve seen on our trip. A random roadside fence with bras of all shades and sizes hanging as far as the eye can see. Wondering if I should be worried that our musical little love bug burst into a spontaneous “I love boobies boobies boobies!” song and started crying when we had to get back in the car….

The “musical little love bug” mentioned is their son Milo. For the full story (including more photos and maps) click here.

The Weirdest Things to Happen to Food This Year

That’s the title of a long tweetstream composed by @WeWantPlates.  This group is protesting, um, innovative food presentations.  You can read the whole thing at https://twitter.com/i/moments/808810815147032576. Or you can have a specially-curated, printable pdf version (23 mb) by clicking here.

So this is the weirdest things to happen to food this year. And here’s a taste of what you’ll be getting (sorry):

Um, that's not a handbag The Weirdest Things to Happen to Food This Year

Um, that’s not a handbag (click for larger image)